Tâm sự của Sana

Sana là cô gái Ấn độ một mình đi du lịch bụi khắp nơi và đây là lời tâm sự của cô ấy về khó khăn của một phụ nữ đi du lịch bụi một mình ngay tại đất nước mình.

Cái này là tôi cảm thông được nè mọi người. Tôi cũng gặp khó khăn tương tự  khi ở Ấn độ nhưng do tôi là người nước ngoài, có hộ chiếu nước ngoài nên những khó khăn cũng đỡ hơn cô ấy nhiều. Ít ra người ta không lầm tưởng tôi là gái điếm. Còn việc cô ấy vì đi một mình nên thường bị xem là gái điếm là điều có thể hiểu. Cái này tôi trải qua rồi khi gặp cộng đồng người Việt ở Lào và Thái Lan nên hoàn toàn hiểu được cảm giác của cô gái này. Nói túm lại có khi đi bụi ở nước ngoài lại dễ hơn là đi bụi trong nước nữa đó mọi người.

Vì đồng cảm với cô gái nên tôi đăng nguyên bài viết bằng tiếng Anh của cô ấy lên đây cho mọi người đọc. Nguồn của bài viết gốc là ở đây

Traveling alone in India is not always easy.

Traveling alone in India as a girl is worse.

Traveling alone in India as a single Indian girl is the worst!

I always smile sarcastically when other foreign backpackers assume that traveling as an Indian within India must be such a breeze. Other than speaking the language which is sometimes a curse in itself, being an Indian girl backpacking alone around India is asking for trouble.

It is hard enough traveling alone but traveling alone, being a girl and being an Indian girl is just something that doesn’t sit well with too many Indians. I can’t really blame them because it is not common to see a young Indian girl backpacking across villages or towns of India on her own. It is unfortunately, just not done. So when they do see one such weirdo i.e me, they have this expression on their face which screams “Who the hell are you and what planet do you come from?”

It is exhausting to constantly have to explain to shocked Indians why I do what I do…especially when there is no real reason, I sound quite foolish saying “Oh because I love to travel and meet new people and see new places.”

In the south of India, while backpacking through Kerala last year many locals thought that I was a prostitute, wandering around India looking for business!!  And this insane idea of theirs is just reinforced, as other travelers that I did end up befriending happened to be single foreign men. This is since I have rarely met other Indian backpackers, and there aren’t too many single foreign female travelers in India- I don’t blame them and the ones that do travel with friends aren’t that keen on making new friends.

This mad idea of me being a wandering prostitute was not only shocking but extremely upsetting. I used to cry because I had such a hard time finding a room at guesthouses even in the bigger cities: I have been told not once but thrice that it is risky to have me!  Risky to give aroom to a 5 foot 2 inches tiny little thing who weighs about 100 pounds, but not risky to give a room to that heavily drugged, tattooed and pierced foreigner who hasn’t had a shower in about four days (Sorry Bob I know I shouldn’t mention you in the write up because I know you couldn’t hurt a fly but just trying to make a point of how we both are not risky business.) And it’s unfortunate that many times I have to get the help of a foreign tourist to find a room in my own country!

Or another guesthouse where the conversation with the receptionist went something like this; 

me: Hello, could you tell me how much a single room would cost?

Him: Yes, how much is the rate?

Me: Yes, I would like to know the rate.

Him: Yes, how much is the rate for one night?

Me: Yes, for one night. (By now I am thinking to myself am I not being clear enough)

Him:  Yes madam, what is your rate for one night?

Me: No sir, it is your hotel you must tell me the rate …….wait a second did you ask what my rate is for a night??!!!??

I constantly am subjected to a billion questions when I am traveling through India such as why am I doing this, do I not have any friends to go with ( my friends you see what I have to go through because you aren’t with me), am I running away from home, do my parents know what I am up to, where do I get the money from, why did I come to this village instead of going to London….Why?Why?Why? The list goes on and on.

In the beginning I would answer back with my wisecracks and ask them why can’t Indian girls travel, why are we being treated so differently …which didn’t really help because then they would just think I am delusional and crazy. One group at a railway station in Rajasthan, India even called the local railway cop to question me about my whereabouts. It was all quite amusing.

I had even started sporting a wedding band which I thought would help not only keep those lecherous men away but also reduce the number of questions. But  I was sadly mistaken since the questions are still there but just of a different kind – where is your husband, does he know you are traveling by yourself, why is he not with you…. Why? Why? Why? The list goes on and on.

A couple of days back I gave a lecture at a local girls university in the United Arab Emirates about traveling alone as a women and one of the girls asked me if during my travels in India, I sometimes pretended not to be Indian. “Yes” I said promptly and emphatically. Many times in India it is so much easier for me to pretend not to be Indian until of course I have to show my passport. Until then I let some of them think I am Israeli (unfortunately) or South American, because of my long curly hair and crazy clothes, so that I can go about my day like just any other traveler ,enjoying India without the questions.

When I look back at all of these unbelievable moments, I just have to laugh them off. Because if I didn’t laugh at the ridiculousness of it all I would never travel in my amazing country which would be a total shame.  So no more do I mind the stares, the questions, and being thought of as a prostitute because the positives of traveling in India far outweigh all this rubbish.

So, the next time you tell me “Sana, it must be so easy for you to travel in India”, think again.

PS: This piece is dedicated to all the other Indian women traveling around and to my friend Vikram Ahuja: you are one of the most focused people I know.